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If Michelle falls in the woods

March 12, 2011

As part of my training, I do cross training.  Not the best part of my day as I try to navigate the whole world of land sports.  There is pilates, which after 2 years I've sort of figured out without launching myself off the reformer, not that I haven't made some very valient attempts at these types of dismounts.  Then there is my functional training class.  My trainer for this class keeps switching things up every 6 months or so, which means that I can't quite ever get my footing.

It was just such a day last Thursday when Lynette pulled out the bosu balls.  I have an extreme distaste for these pieces of exercise equipment and of course the person that invented these torture devices.  Rather than using this as individual torture devices, Lynette had us put these into a fun circle of hell for the whole class.  Ok maybe it was only a circle of hell for me.  Now rather than my own personal discourse with the bosu ball, I would have to contend with one of my classmates chasing me from behind.  AWESOME! 

I don't recall the particulars around the steps that we were supposed to be doing and what I was doing my best to pretend to do.   I know that one of our faster people in class was behind me.  I just wanted to keep moving so that my embarrasment would hopefully end soon.  Oh no fate was not smiling on me Thursday.  I took one step on a bosu and went down hard.  I fell like a tree newly cut in the forest, straight and with a resounding boom.  I'm pretty sure the floor shook.  I didn't have a moment to even think as one moment I was fumbling on the bosu and the next I was laying on my left side.  It is really hard to look cool when you are flopping like a fish on the floor.  Thankfully I didn't even have a chance to brace for the fall.  Maybe fate was smiling the force of my fall I'm sure would have snapped something.  As it was, my pride was totally bruised. 

Naturally the class came to a halt after my tumble, as I tried to explain I was totally fine and pop up from the floor with a push up for good measure.  Someone walked over to the offending bosu ball and stepped on it and nicely commented "oh yeah, this one is slippery."  I know they were just trying to make me feel better.  The bosu wasn't slippery.  I'm just completely inept at land sports and this was practically the tattoo on my forehead that screamed it out. 

I finished out the class by doing the steps lamely around the bosu circle while the rest of the class danced lightly on them like ballet dancers in Swan Lake.  So unfair!

While I thought my humiliation would be confined to the classroom, it was not to be the case.  I was in the locker room talking with a friend when they mentioned "Hey didn't you completely fall in functional training."  This goes to show what a collosal fall this was.  It has become the stuff of legends.  Oh yeah it was that good and LOUD.  For this reason, I've concluded that I do believe that if a tree fell in the forest and nobody was there to hear it, does it make a sound?  Heck YES!  My bruised shoulder and hip have healed, my pride is slowly coming along.  At least I can bring humor to the class.

2 Responses to “If Michelle falls in the woods”

  1. Kristy says:

    LMAO…so vivid michelle, i can totally see you doing this 😉  maybe next time will go better…practice makes perfect.  thanks for the laugh, i'm glad your body and pride are doing better! 

  2. Francisca says:

    LMAO! For the record I was in class that day and it was more like a small thud. The rebound was impressive.
    Remember we all look like drowning cats when we are in the pool while you effortlessly swim circles around us while we slowly drown. 🙂

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